Last Letter

This time next week I will be in Chicago with David!

I got his last set of letters today, and I thought his last letter in particular was quite amazing. It's long, but it's worth reading. His wisdom is incredible, and I am so thankful that his time in basic has been spiritually fruitful if nothing else!

November 16

"I was praying this morning while taking a shower (which is the best part of the day), and I realized the summary of the whole military experience up to this point. Paul talks about how our lives are not our own. I think this is the key to everything. Oswald Chambers also talks about this same topic a lot too. Most of my time I worry about what I think is best or what I want for our life. However I don't think this is the right mindset to have. Our lives no longer belong to us. We must submit to the plan God has set before us. This does not necessarily mean God doesn't care what we want. In fact, our lives ultimately are far better off in Christ.

The vital thing to remember is that it may not be easy, but we must let our lives be run by God. It makes it difficult to try and figure out what we should do next, if all we have to go on is what is best or what we "want" to do. Inevitably we will choose the easiest route if left to ourselves. However when we must make decisions but we do it with the larger picture of God's plan in mind, it becomes clearer not easier. Often this requires a lot of sacrifice. Think about it like this: Is God's plan really so small that it is deterred because I get homesick? I doubt it. Instead I think God will grant the strength to accomplish His plan.

This whole concept is something I really struggle with. It is very hard to submit my entire life to God. It is risky to lay our life out there for God to do with what He wants.

Sometimes I feel like our situation is similar to Jonah's in the Old Testament. God has called us to do something that at this point I don't "want" to do. So we could run away from it. However in the long run Jonah running off did not pay off. Short term he didn't have to do what God asked, but the result was that he brought calamity to himself and those around him. The better thing is to be obedient from the start.

I feel like we have just walked through a dark time, and now I am praying that we will come out of it soon. God breaks us to help us learn. It is necessary, but I am ready for us to be restored. As long as I am at bootcamp (away from you) I will be broken, but when we see each other again restoration can begin. So that is my prayer, that God will start the re-building process. That way we are full of strength to take on the next challenge."